grad·u·ate
[n., adj. graj-oo-it, -eyt; v. graj-oo-eyt]
noun
[n., adj. graj-oo-it, -eyt; v. graj-oo-eyt]
noun
A person who is leaving everything they know to embark on something cool/scary/awesome/terrifying/far away/foreign (etc.), and is really very frightened.
...Okay, so I made that up. But that's what it is to me.
As I sit here and think about the fact that I have 2 more school days as a high schooler I am realizing that my senioritis is actually backtracking, and turning into hesitation, sadness, and pure RAW fear. But, I am also SO excited at the same time. But some of my best friends are moving away. A lot of them. Almost all of them. Moving away, like me, but going to their own new and scary locations. In my perfect world, I would pack them all up and tac them to a bulletin board in my dorm, buuuuuut... I have a bad feeling that's not a possibility.
My bess fraan Stephanie Noelle (love you long time) suggested that I write a blog that is a selection for my future. Explaining what I am doing now, what I am thinking now, and where I think my life will go. I thought "Whoa Steph, what a knee-slappin' good idea!" So, this is where I am.
Commencing...
Right now in my life, my only conclusion about what I want to do in the future is good things. I want to help people. I don't know with what exactly yet. Maybe nothing specific. Maybe everything. I just know I want to work with people and help them. Lately, i've been highly considering working on trying to get a major that emphasizes somehow on Human Rights. I really want that. =yaknowwhatimean? I also know that I want to go to Africa. SO. BAD. I want to go teach music to little kids there, build homes, nurse people to health, and make people smile as they make me cry. I want to be enlightened. I just want to help. More than anything I want at all.
As for now, I am just trying to adjust to the idea that everything is going to change. Everything. Every routine I've ever fallen into, every scenic structure I'm used to glancing at, and every person I have interacted with - will be different. Holy hell, right?
I am feeling: Terranxioued
(terrified, anxious, excited)
Here's to a million tears, four hundred panic attacks, forty graduation parties, and the freshman fifteen!
...Okay, so I made that up. But that's what it is to me.
As I sit here and think about the fact that I have 2 more school days as a high schooler I am realizing that my senioritis is actually backtracking, and turning into hesitation, sadness, and pure RAW fear. But, I am also SO excited at the same time. But some of my best friends are moving away. A lot of them. Almost all of them. Moving away, like me, but going to their own new and scary locations. In my perfect world, I would pack them all up and tac them to a bulletin board in my dorm, buuuuuut... I have a bad feeling that's not a possibility.
My bess fraan Stephanie Noelle (love you long time) suggested that I write a blog that is a selection for my future. Explaining what I am doing now, what I am thinking now, and where I think my life will go. I thought "Whoa Steph, what a knee-slappin' good idea!" So, this is where I am.
Commencing...
Right now in my life, my only conclusion about what I want to do in the future is good things. I want to help people. I don't know with what exactly yet. Maybe nothing specific. Maybe everything. I just know I want to work with people and help them. Lately, i've been highly considering working on trying to get a major that emphasizes somehow on Human Rights. I really want that. =yaknowwhatimean? I also know that I want to go to Africa. SO. BAD. I want to go teach music to little kids there, build homes, nurse people to health, and make people smile as they make me cry. I want to be enlightened. I just want to help. More than anything I want at all.
As for now, I am just trying to adjust to the idea that everything is going to change. Everything. Every routine I've ever fallen into, every scenic structure I'm used to glancing at, and every person I have interacted with - will be different. Holy hell, right?
I am feeling: Terranxioued
(terrified, anxious, excited)
Here's to a million tears, four hundred panic attacks, forty graduation parties, and the freshman fifteen!
LOVE THIS AND LOVE YOU!!!
ReplyDeleteI love your blog!
ReplyDeleteThanks Sissy! And thanks so much anonymous! I am so glad you do!
ReplyDelete